Transcript – Cascais Meditation & Spiritual Musings
(Caution: The below is an unedited transcript. It’s likely to have many errors and inconsistencies.)
My friends, there’s a fundamental misunderstanding in the spiritual journey that makes this way too difficult, pointed to in the meditation- It’s the idea that you have to do something. It’s the idea that it’s not already done and the whole foundation, the whole basis of spirituality is to point you in a direction of seeing what’s true, not what you must do or must not do, but to see more deeply what is actually real.
As human beings, we have the opportunity to play in being human and in this play, very naturally we get lost. We imagine things that aren’t really there. We believe things that are impossible. We get lost and confused and then something within the being longs to return home.
Home to what? What is true. In every quality of all things spiritual as it relates to wholeness, love, peace, joy, everything that our being craves. All of these expressions are expressions of the truth. That when you see the truth of life, the truth of what you are, what follows is some expression of love.
And, so in this is an invitation to surrender any movement inside of yourself that adds a burden to your experience that says you must do something. And, even if it’s just for these moments together, be open to the possibility that it’s already done.
In the same way that as we sit in this space, we can recognize a peace. We can recognize a spaciousness that allows us to breathe more fully. And, do you recognize that this quality of presence, of right now, is actually always here?
Even as you go for a walk, even as you drive your car, this quality of presence that you can sense right now is actually always present. And do you see that when we don’t feel connected to it, we’re lost in our imagination? We’re lost in what we think to be real, where we’re going, what we think is happening, what we’re afraid of. None of which is actually happening in now.
There’s a willingness to let go of what’s not real, and in that willingness, one begins to breathe, and in that breath, we connect with the present.
And whatever your spiritual insight, whatever the profound nature of your discovery, in some way or another, you can be assured that the discovery says, “Oh, it’s not what I thought it was”. The discovery is, “I thought something that was true that wasn’t really true”.
And this is really good news to whatever degree you might be able to sense it or taste it or touch it, but it points to a discovery that if there is any tension inside of you, if there is any perceived lack of love, joy, wellness, then there is an innocent misunderstanding about what’s real. And for me, my heart says, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
And the more we rest in such a space of investigation as this, as one gathers experience in life with an open heart, what you begin to see more and more clearly is that you cannot trust the mind’s content. To trust the mind’s content takes you away from presence.
Notice this – how many times you thought you knew something that brought you into a space of anxiety, worry, and fear, to really believe what the mind was saying only to find out it wasn’t true. Not to offer judgment toward the mind, but just to see the reality of the situation that the mind only thinks it knows.
And, this is where we offer ourselves to the truth rather than chasing mental content. We say, “Oh, yeah… the truth is not in the mind. I will not connect to what I am in the mind. I must surrender what is in the mind”, which is simply an expression that says, “I don’t really know,” [inaudible] the mind can’t really figure this out.
And in the release, you find yourself more available to be touched by the truth. And this is a pointer that has been pointed to for thousands of years. In some way or another, the student looks for the truth with a cup that is already full. The more one thinks they know, the less they will listen. And so the path of spirituality is one that will empty you out of everything you think you know, so that you can become available to see what has always been true, what is true and what always will be true. Because it is this truth that you can trust in. It is this truth that is eternal
It is this truth that will be with you always as everything else comes and goes, transforms, changes.
The topic today is, “All is Forgiven in the Illusion”.
And so we speak a little bit on the nature of forgiveness and maybe see it’s practicality in our everyday lives beyond just a spiritual concept.
And to point to an understanding of spirituality that I would suggest is more in alignment with the truth of life. It’s to point to a nature of forgiveness that is already done in such a way as everything else that is desired. Also noting that forgiveness is not something that you do, and notice this – is the traditional challenge for human beings in forgiveness. It’s the idea that you either should forgive, that it’s up to you to forgive, and then also, as it relates to being forgiven from another, that they forgive you or they should. You see, there’s this idea wrapped around a concept that again says, “It’s up to you”.
And oftentimes, we can even find ourselves playing a game where we say we forgive, but inside we can’t find any evidence of that forgiveness. Inside, something that’s still torn apart. And so I am pointing to in a very playful way, a quality of forgiveness, that is a real liberation.
And let us speak to the nature, and it may be a particular flavor of forgiveness; and the playful part for me is to illustrate such things.
Like for example, and I always point to the forest because nature is my teacher, imagine one tree falls on another tree.
Do you see how the tree that was struck by another tree can blame that tree in a way that says, “You did that. You fell on me”. Just notice that.
And notice the pain that comes with this and also the mind’s assumption that it knows. It looks at the other tree and says, “You fell on me”.
And as one rest with a willingness to see what’s really happening, do you see that in some way or another, the tree was pushed in the falling? Do you see in some way or another you blame the tree and then the tree blames the wind? And then, the wind blames the rotation of the planet? And then, the planet blames the galaxy?
Do you see the perceived opposite or the issue of forgiveness is resolving blame? It’s a blame that says, “I know what happened”. And, the thing about the nature of blame is, it’s unending. It has no beginning. If you blame one thing, then that thing can blame another thing. You look at a human being and say, “That person’s messed up. It must be their [sic] parents fault.” And then you talk to the parents and then the parents blame their parents and on and on and on and on it goes. Do you see how there’s no root to blame?
Do you see that the tree’s forgiveness of the other tree is to realize that the other tree is to not, is not to be blamed?
And stay with the simplicity of this illustration rather than trying to take it into the complex. Just see the principle in what I’m saying. Do you see in some way or another, the tree’s forgiveness of the other tree is almost like a bow that says, “What was had to be?”
And notice, and this is the real root of the issue as it relates to forgiveness.
The real root of the issue of forgiveness is that we blame ourselves.
Notice this. And, you can notice that if there’s any pain in your own being in some way or another,
You can find a self-blame.
And in the blaming of yourself, you can then blame your parents. In the blaming of yourself, you find other people to blame.
Is there any end to that?
Do you see how every element in the forest is not separate from all of the other elements? In the way that the mushrooms are as they are because the flowers are as they are? The birds fly as they do because of the ways that the trees move in the wind? Do you see that there is no element in the forest that truly moves independently? Notice this- it’s only in the mind that says that.
Do you see, and stay with the simple, do you see that every element in the forest is blameless?
Also, do you see that every element in the forest is doing exactly what it’s supposed to be doing in order for the forest to be the forest? Every tree is falling right on time. Every season changing right on time in order for life to be life. Do you see the blame, in some way or another, argues with what’s happening because it doesn’t understand what’s happening?
In this, you can see that the nature of blame is in essence, an alarm that says, “Something’s being misunderstood”. Because, and this might be a stretch, but see it in nature, everything is blameless. All is forgiven in nature because nothing moves on its own.
Do you notice when you recognize this truth in the forest, as you walk through the forest, everything is forgiven? In such a way that every element in the forest can’t possibly get it wrong?
You know that whatever these elements do in the forest, it’s doing so in a way that serves the forest. In a way that serves the forest so that, the forest can be the forest, regardless if its aesthetically pleasing, regardless if it appears organized, regardless if it smells good. Please see this.
The play of both day and night in the forest is required for the forest to be the forest. Without both sides, there would be no forest. How silly it would be to blame the nighttime?
Not realizing that the nighttime is what allows for the daytime and then daytime bows to the nighttime.
There is nothing to blame for, if you blame the nighttime, you also blame the daytime.
If you blame the trees, you also blame the wind. To blame one thing is to blame everything.
And I’ll tell you this, I guess quickly because we’re making this somewhat short, although I always get inspired to do a five day retreat on the topic that I’m speaking on because this can go into so much stuff, but we can say that the very root issue of our experience with blame and an unallowed forgiveness in the world is because we have blamed for [sic] ourselves. And if the one who is experiencing has a self-blame, if they see that as a real something, then when they look out from those eyes, they see blame in the world.
And so, the real healing of this is not so much to see it in the world, though that will point back to the real issue, but it’s to see the blameless in you, to see that your actions are not your actions. They are the actions of life.
Notice this, please. Do you notice the more separate you feel from life, the more violent you become?
The more separate you perceive yourself to be, then your actions become more separate in nature in such a way that the more you blame yourself, the more you blame others.
You see the concern from the mind’s standpoint for one says, “If I… If I stopped blaming myself, then I don’t know how I’m going to function in the world,” or “We as human beings can’t operate that way”. And again, I’m not talking about all of human beings. I’m talking about the one who’s willing to look in this direction.
Such a discovery of truth is only available for the one who’s willing to look, the one who is ready to look and as such, these things that I say are not for the world, it’s for the one who sees.
Because when you see the blameless inside of yourself, you see that there’s nothing to blame in your being. You see that what has moved through your being has been the forest moving. You start to see that in every other human being. Do you see how there’s a love that emerges in the same way that when a child makes a mistake because they’re [sic] learning, do you see how it’s blameless?
It’s almost like, if the child knew then it would be different, but they didn’t know they’re learning. Do you see how there’s no blame in that? It’s, “Oh, your discovery”.
And I guess I need to touch on the other side of this coin as it relates to the nature of suffering in quickly and then we’ll move into some dialogue in QA, but understand that, and I’m speaking from my experience that when I experience suffering to any degree, the mind looks for something to blame. It can look toward a person, an object, something. It says, “Why am I feeling this way?” And it looks to project guilt on to something or someone in the world. And what I’ve discovered on this journey that is so hilarious is it’s literally impossible for anything outside of me to make me feel a certain way.
Because my emotional experience is 100% determined by how I see the interpretations I give. Somebody sends me a text and says, “Actually, I don’t want to hang out this weekend”. Do you see the traditional way says, “Oh, I feel like shit because they canceled”?
Right? That’s a blame. “Because you didn’t follow through”, “Because you didn’t do this or that, I now feel rejected”, but do you see my feeling, my suffering was because of how I interpreted the text message? The pain, the suffering I was [sic] experienced in that example was entirely my own creation.
It’s not to say I blame myself because it’s an opportunity to see that. It’s a gift because in the recognition of this, you see that you’re free. You see that you can let go of the other person and say, “Oh, actually it wasn’t you,” in such a way that says “Thank you for doing what you did so that I could see that. Thank you for being exactly how you are so that I can see the depth of my own beauty”.
Do you see how in a way the forgiveness of the other person is a forgiveness that recognizes, “Actually, there was nothing to blame at all. So in this, my forgiveness of that person isn’t really a forgiveness of them because they didn’t do it wrong. My forgiveness is a recognition that forgiveness was already done. There wasn’t anything to blame”. And again, we can find all sorts of extreme examples, but I’m going to say in a direct way, regardless of how extreme we imagined it to be, the principle remains, and I know that that can be difficult, but it’s true.
Real forgiveness, and again, I can only speak to my own experience and you see how it resonates with you, as one who has been through this life in such ways that we could all agree as human beings, nobody should ever go through. What I’ve seen is that my forgiveness of all of it is a forgiveness that recognizes what I thought happened didn’t really happen. That which gave me a pain of suffering was based on a misunderstanding, not on what actually happened. Like the tree that gets touched by another tree as it’s falling, do you see that the tree that’s with suffering takes personally the other tree that was falling? “This other tree fell on me”. And then the mind creates all sorts of meanings about that, and recognize that it’s the meaning that hurts.
All of the physical pains that I’ve experienced through my life, they have been non-issues compared to the pain I’ve created in my mind with meanings that aren’t really there. And so if I am to forgive anything, what I forgive is the mind. I forgive it’s misunderstanding and it’s so forgivable and understandable and innocent because, yes, it looked that way in the grand nature of the illusion of life, it looked that way.
Does it mean it was that way? No, but it looked that way. And this really ties together both sides of the coin where we can allow for things to look how they did or allow other people to see things as they see them, like if someone blames you, no need to blame their blame. It can be acknowledged that if someone blames you, that to them, that’s what it looks like, and your heart can say, “Yeah, I see that. I can see that it looks that way and I can see that that hurts. I’m sorry”, but in your heart, you know it’s not really true because the only thing that’s true is the truth – that all is one.
You see, this truth? You see how it doesn’t protect you from the world? It doesn’t protect you from other people blaming you? It doesn’t protect an image of yourself of how other people see you? The real scope of such deep truth is that it brings a sense of wellness to your being, in your being.
Where you are now able to walk into a world that might seem chaotic, while knowing you’re okay in a way that we can illustrate to discover the truth of the forest, that it is blameless. You now walk through the forest and nothing changes. You see this is the often motivation-spirituality is we’re trying to change the forest. We say, “Oh man, if only this was different. If this was different, than I could enjoy the forest”. Do you see to really connect with the truth of these things, you let go of the forest? You allow it to be and you walk through it? And, so these insights and these discoveries are not for you to change something. It’s to see what’s already there and to know that it’s perfectly placed, to know that it is blameless and to know that all is forgiven.
The way I experienced it was … have to [sic] one of my biggest trauma– I felt grateful. And I was like, “Are you crazy? [laughter] How can you be grateful for that?” And then I finally stopped that blame train saying, “What are you allowing them? Do you need this to stop it?
No, I’m here. So…
and then, the minds kept playing games on me through other people saying, “How can you forgive? How can you be grateful for [sir]? How can you accept and accept?” No, I wouldn’t be here without this. [agreement]
No, and do you see how easy it is for the world to not get it? [agreement] You see, this will be one of the biggest challenges is that when you see the truth, it’ll seem like nobody else understands you,
Without a victim [agreement]. They want to keep the victim alive.
Yes, and similar, in my experience in the perceived trauma that I went through as a kid. In that time it wasn’t a big deal. It was forgiven, but then I bought in to the stories by [sic] everyone else. It’s like, everybody else wanted me to be a victim and so I adopted that in order to get their approval. ‘Cause if I just in my innocent nature as a child, if I said, “It’s fine, I understand”, then they think I’m weird, something’s wrong with me. And even today, it’s like, as I live my human experience — people think there’s something wrong with me. [laughter] Right? You can’t just love everything. Right? You can’t just forgive everything, man. Something– you’re a psychopath, something wrong with you. [laughter]
And that’s okay? [laughter]
That’s okay. You see that’s blameless too. [agreement] And which is so funny because that compounds the issue for the other person. It’s like if they tell me I’m crazy and I tell them, “That’s okay”. Then, that’s even worse [laughter] because in their mind they think, “I think they’re crazy”, but it’s like, “No, you’re fine as you are”. People have a really hard time with that- that everything’s okay. [agreement] Because for the human being to be a human being, it’s like for you to be a separate person, you have to have a problem.
And, let’s say that we see as a bad thing that happened. Let’s say you have an accident or anything. Eventually, it’s an occasion for you to learn something. [agreement] So you should be thankful for it.
That feels a lot better.
And you must say thank you to what happened to me. [agreement]
And, I even encourage people, mostly, if their heart is very open, that even if they don’t understand, just say, “Thank you”. Just to be still inside of yourself and just say, “Thank you. I don’t understand, but thank you”, because something in you recognizes a fundamental truth. It’s like, a fundamental gratitude. Something inside of you is thankful, but the mind wants to argue. The mind wants to protect your ego structure. “I thought I was going to be this and I thought I was going here and here and here and this seems to have interrupted,” but when you surrender that ego structure and come back to the present moment, there is a gratitude there.
You should be thankful. Supposedly, you have a flu. You should not curse it that you have a flu. You should say, “My body maybe needs a break. I need a rest. Thanks, [sic] God, I have a flu. So I stay at home”, as a simple example. [agreement]
You see and this is openness,
but I use that, but everybody around me thinks I’m crazy. [agreement]
Welcome to the club. [laughter] You feel ready?
I say, “Good, because your body needs a rest”. [agreement] People don’t understand you
Not yet —
It’s not their normal.
–not yet, not yet.
They’re playing their cards so — [agreement]
Everyone is playing their part perfectly. [agreement] And, this is the real teacher from your being. It’s not convincing people, it’s just loving people. [agreement]
It’s just loving people as they are, letting them see what they see and you being you. You see, it’s almost like, the same energy of allowing everything to be in the forest to be what it is. No argument. Just, “Oh, thank you. Thank you. Oh, you stink. Thank you. Oh, Wow! That’s really gross. I’m going to go over here. Thank you. Thank you, because if it wasn’t for your stinkiness, the forest would not be the forest”. Do you see this? It doesn’t mean that I have to hang around. That’s like, the spiritual ego that says, “Oh… okay, well, this is allowed so I have to love this”. No. You see, love is undefinable in form in the way that it shapes itself. Love can give breath to a staying and love can give breath to a going. See this, you can’t capture love’s movement as an idea. And that’s what most of us [sic] trying to do as spiritual concepts. We say, “What is compassion? What is kindness? What is love?” You see how that tries to define it that says it looks like this or it looks like that? No–No. Those are pointers, but it’s not really what it is.
I think it comes down to [an] art of allowing. Everything [start] allowing. Like, true compassion is the art of allowing. Everything to be as it is.
Isn’t that beautiful?
That’s compassion– That is compassion.
‘Cause the mind always tries to control everything. I’m very guilty of that. You know, when you listen to the mind, we’re controlling things. We’re putting them in boxes. That’s not allowing, that’s just when we go to the forest, we say, “That branch is broken. That bush is that [sic] needs some more water”. You know what I mean? This — the grass is overgrown. We’re controlling what is already just happening, like things–just not allowing things to happen.
And do you see how that not allowing is allowed? [agreement] In such a way, that the unforgiveness is already forgiven, and it’s important because you’re not allowing is allowed so that, you can see the pain of not allowing. It’s like the teacher is allowed. [agreement]
I wrote when you were talking about forgiveness, I wrote, “Forgiveness is a recognition that blame existed or was present. And so it’s — what? It’s allowing you to see what you’re holding or what’s [sic] your not allowed [agreement] Like, so no, no — I’m using the same words to describe it, but that’s what it is. You’re–when you forgive somebody, say, “Oh, forgiveness was always there”. [agreement] But I was blaming something. As blame was present here, you’re recognizing the blame. [agreement] And then, it just disappears. [agreement]
And do you see to be willing to recognize the blame can teach you so much about where you’re not allowing. Like think about this like in a– work environment or something. You know, if you’re listening to your system and your being and you feel this blame, do you see how that’s an opportunity to open? ’cause you notice how you shut down in that blame? It’s like nothing’s flowing now. And the egoic structure wants to hold onto its image rather than let life flow, but you can see from a practical standpoint, it’s much more advantageous for all to acknowledge the blame and to see what it’s pointing to. ‘Cause it’s like, one person or like me in the example, could say, “I feel blame”. That means I’m blocking something, which isn’t allowing for us all to flourish. And so to acknowledge that blame, to clarify it, you’ll know an immediate return of flow always like in your own experience. If you’re shut down and if you’re blocked, the moment you kind of resolve the issue, which has always some form of forgiveness, right? Letting go of something? Then, the flow returns. And so you can see this as, it’s like a fractal, I mean it works that way in you. It works in that way in groups. It works in that way in communities.
It’s like the answer is there–always, waiting to be seen–
I think we can see that in physical pain as well. Primarily because our body gives us signals like that. So ’cause you were bringing up work, I’m standing in my desk and working and then, I start, maybe I’m not– I haven’t been breathing properly or I didn’t take a break and then my body starts to tense up. Many times people just push through that. [agreement] Maybe they get a headache. Maybe they have to take a sick day. Like you’re saying again, flu. If they were just listening to, “Oh, wait a minute! I’m starting to feel a little bit of tension or pressure. I’m going to allow myself to walk away from this for a moment”, and then the flow return as you were saying. [agreement]
To really acknowledge what seems like, especially in today’s business world, we don’t value what’s felt and mostly, on an individual level. We don’t value it in ourselves because we’re trying to value the outside. We’re trying to acquire something in the world and so we don’t show that part of ourselves. We don’t acknowledge that part, hoping to capture something on the outside and we missed the real prize. We missed the development inside of our being. By listening to that and I think the landscape of our work life or even the family life or whatever. The landscape is a teacher that points you inward. That’s why all of these disturbances are so aloud. It’s like, to go to work with an openness that says, “I am so willing to be disturbed today.”
[Laughter] That’s right!
I am so willing to be pissed off because that points me to what’s blocking the flow. I’m open to learn and I’ll tell you, this is the defining difference from what I see as between, quote, unquote, internally and externally successful people and those who are not, and I don’t mean just externally successful, but inwardly as well, is that they move into the landscape with a profound openness, and it’s also a movement that’s not protecting an ego structure or less and less over time. It’s a willingness to see what’s happening on the inside. There’s a total experiential accountability which says, “There is nothing in the world that has power that only I can create disturbance. And so I want to see where I create disturbance so that healing can flow there”. And that’s such a different perspective than moving in the world that kind of wants to push away from disturbances that avoid being disturbed. Because think about the more open you are, you’re almost saying, “Okay, life, I want to play”. Do you see how quickly you learn? Or you drag it out your whole life, you know, kind of avoiding the issue. It’s almost like, when you’re passionate about something, do you see how open you are to make mistakes? That’s why there’s this beautiful alignment where you’re engaged in something that heartfully resonates, like, to your core. You’re much more willing to learn. You’re much more willing to move with openness. Now, imagine you’re stuck in a career or a job that doesn’t resonate at all. Do you see how you just want to avoid all that yet?
But thus, is the discovery in these things. You recognize a freedom to be more of yourself, a freedom to move in what you actually resonate with and which is a great allowing for you to be you. In, in the great allowing for you to be you, there’s a natural development of these spiritual things that is, it’s just automatic.
When you say there’s a technique or a practice that you can start implementing right away like for this?
You know, I’m sure there is, but I’m just not the guy–you know–
‘Cause we talk about it, we talked about this and you know, I’ve already practiced it myself, but I’m saying it’s I think it’s good to have some sort of practicality. So, for example, I walk into the office and then something really irritates me, and then I start to point my finger. I love that thing, when you point one finger, three point back at you. So, I’m pointing my finger at someone, “Stop, take a moment”, and say, “Okay, I’ve been like, I, well, I’ve been shaped. I’m giving powers to this thing. I’m externally giving my power away. What?” Maybe the answer won’t come right away as to why it’s pushing my buttons or whatever. But maybe, even just noticing that it was happening rather than just going in a negative track to the, you know, the downward spiral. [agreement] Pause for a moment. Like Saved by the Bell Zack. We’d like press it and you talk to the cameras, ”Pause it for a moment’ and say, “Okay, this is happening”. And then, we can start to explore maybe why that’s happening and then your mind can start asking the questions of, “Okay, interesting”. [agreement]
It’s all of those practices are opportunities of presence, right? [agreement] It’s interrupting the normal routine, like inserting this or inserting that to interrupt the pattern. And I think, that’s the value and that’s why there’s infinite opportunity for that. And so I would say find something that resonates, something that’s playful and fun, right? Engage this from a playful thing because you can find a spiritual practice that’s punishment. [agreement]
And that’s just an unending cycle of self-guilt. You know that it’s the discovery, through that is a discovery to see that it was never necessary. It’s like, “Oh, I could have enjoyed this”.
It’s like getting away from suffering with suffering.
Yes, Yes! Suffering isn’t necessary, but it’s required to show you that it’s not necessary. So I mean, it’s perfectly allowed. But I think that’s also fun from a practical standpoint is to come up with little things, little spiritual practices that maybe don’t even appear spiritual, but they resonate, you know, for the individual.
Anything that’s just gonna bring you back to present rather than spinning and pushing through and doing all those things that were meant to be to. [agreement]
And you see? This is the nature of spiritual practice- is no matter what it is, you see that in some way or another, it just invites presence?
That’s all. And you see how we get lost in the practice as if that’s the thing? You think that that’s the answer. No! Presence is the answer. That was just your doorway in the presence. Because if you mistake it, then you’ll start thinking the practice is the prize and then it becomes punishment. It’s like, one person can say, “Man, meditation has been so helpful. I’m not really into it anymore, but it was helpful five years ago so, I better keep doing it”. Rather than opening up to something that transforms with your development. Right? Like baby food is very beneficial when you’re a baby. [laughter]
Could you imagine being 25 and be like, “Man, I’m still eating this baby food. It was so helpful but it’s so gross”.
Well, like you — do you say that you went through a phase recently? It’s kind of like you’re feeling is feeling stuck and feeling really frustrated? And I think, I’m not sure, these are the words you use that, you’re like “Meditation’s not working”. And he was sitting and he was meditating and you’ve just came out more frustrated. It’s like, “It’s not working.” [inaudible] It used to work because it’s like a forceful practice and it wasn’t, you know, it wasn’t allowing him to be present. Or really — you’re an artist, maybe painting or going to take the dogs out for what would have been more beneficial because it wasn’t allowing him ’cause then you are giving too much power to that practice and this period was not there. So, it was not spiritual at all. [agreement]
Rather to say, “It’s an occasion for me to learn something. This problem was brought to me today. So I get down to earth that from being up there, the great boss. So I’m here in reality and see that I still have to solve problems and I have to help my employees because I’m their boss and if I shout and curse them, they will do the same to me next time. So, I should be a good example and learn out of this situation.
I love it. It’s just all openness. [laughter]
It goes back to openness. [agreement]
It’s like, “I love that recognition. It’s not working. Am I open to that?” [agreement] [inaudible] opening [inaudible] It’s not working. [agreement]
’cause it’s forgiveness again. If I don’t meditate, I am not a spiritual person and it’s like, “Wait a minute. No”. It’s like, the sound of the brakes in the car. You know? That’s what you need to hear and say–
Breathe and act accordingly to this situation.
What will bring me back to the present moment?
Breathing. [agreement] That’s all. [agreement] What you can do in a second? What else? You breathe, you earth yourself.
That’s so great. [laughter] I think my only practice in that regard is a curiosity into what’s actually happening. So when I feel pain or disturbance, there’s an alarm in where I become curious, “Oh, what’s that really about?” And in that is just — do you see that question? “What’s that really about?” That’s openness? And so in that, it’s its own teacher. It’s like, I have no background in spiritual things. For me, all of this is a heart-inspired common sense. [agreement]
From the question, “What’s really happening?” I remember this when I was like 23 or 24, just paralyzed with depression and I saw myself fighting to get away from it like, “not this, not this, not this”. You see that’s not open? That’s the complete opposite. And then there was this moment where I asked a question I hadn’t asked which was, “What if it’s supposed to be like this? What if this is allowed essentially?”
’cause you would be much stronger after you…
And I noticed that, and this was so profound, the moment I opened to that, there was a fight that begin to leave my system. And I noticed in my complete allowing for me to have the experience, it wasn’t nearly as bad as I was making it out to be. What hurt was my fight against it, and so I surrendered the fight and I realized, “Oh, this isn’t so bad at all”. It’s like, to illustrate one’s argument with the winter, but as soon as you realize the winter’s perfectly placed and arguing with it is insane, you start to see its beauty. You start to see, “Oh, actually, this is something else entirely”. And the same with our emotional seasons to really allow and to see what they’re there for. You see something beautiful, and I don’t mean allow it so you can get rid of it. Accept it so it goes away. Do you see the profound difference in that? It’s a real heart-centered opening. It’s a, man, in such a deep honoring of what’s showing in the way that it’s, “Okay, I’m going to honor the wintertime because it is not so I can get through it and get what I want, but because the winter time is true, because it is”. Do you see that it’s real? And the same with our experiences emotionally. Oftentimes, we’re so determined to get rid of them or get beyond them or get back to a certain emotional experience rather than deeply honoring that says, “This is what’s happening. This is what’s true. This is what’s real”. [agreement]
This reminds me a really good realization in yoga practice. It’s– teach you or tell you for a while, and many of us, when we’re in a yoga posture, you’re holding a yoga posture and the idea’s – you’re holding the yoga posture while breathing normal. But, most people in a yoga class are spending all of their time in the posture waiting to get out of the posture. [agreement] They’re not in the posture and allowing it to themselves to be in it.
So with this, go back to see, insure, and trust, Surrender, Let go. [agreement] That would say that to insure [inaudible] situation. There’s an expression from the very famous psychologist, Phyllis Krystal, and I had many courses with her. She passed away now and she always said, “Trust, surrender, let go”. Keep that from Phyllis Krystal. If you could check it on the Internet, she wrote many, many books about psychology. She was very famous.
“Trust, surrender, let go”. [agreement]
Well do you see that everything that helps see this, everything that helps in life is essentially something that points you to openness? [agreement]
That’s openness as well. That’s — [agreement]
And I speak to this quite a bit about how, as human beings, the confusion is that we think we’re experiencing life out there and so it becomes like an enemy ,so to speak, but what we’re actually experiencing is the way we see. We are actually experiencing perspective, which is like saying, “You are experiencing your painting. How you see something in such a way like this moment right now is blank”. And then you see, you give meaning, you create story. You project something that’s not really there and you see that’s what we are experiencing as human beings is the life we create through the power of perspective, through the power of awareness, looking up and painting and essentially that wholeness or that openness is on the spectrum of wholeness in such a way that I will say that, and I’m just using this to point, but you can see wholeness or you can see separation, which is like saying you can see love and you can see fear.
You see, fear implies that you are separate from the thing you’re observing. Like if you notice anything that you’re afraid of, there is you and that it has to be that way. In order for there to be fear, there has to be separation. “There’s something I’m afraid of that’s outside of me that can get me”. Now, the more you see that what’s actually happening is that you are experiencing your way of seeing, which is to say that you are experiencing something that’s not separate from you but your creation. You have created this so that you can see it. It’s for you and do you see the recognition that it’s your own creation? It immediately becomes less fearful. Do you see that it’s your own creation, you now have a perspective of wholeness? Right? It’s just you. It’s the one you are experiencing what you are and this perspective of wholeness is what brings everything back together. It’s like, “This is allowed. This is the teacher”. All of these spiritual words, they’re all words of wholeness. Like anything that feels good in your being, this is hilarious, is a projection of wholeness.
Notice that like, if a circumstance happens and you perceive it from wholeness, meaning it’s allowed, it’s included, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah. It’ll feel good. If you perceive from separation, it’ll feel shitty. That’s the pain response that if you’re feeling pain, it simply alerts you that you’re perceiving separation. not wrong, not bad. You are perceiving yourself as separate from your creation, and that’s not true. That’s not helpful for your experience, and these are the internal alarms. Again, you’ve come into this experience completely equipped to function. It’s just a matter of understanding what’s actually going on, but to see that your emotional system is an alarm that alerts you to how you’re perceiving, you can quickly readjust, which is when you feel that alarm, you say, “Okay, what’s really happening?”
“Oh, I’m blaming this person”, “Oh, I think I’m missing this”. Right? I start identifying my perceptions of separation, which through my own inquiry into these things I see as impossible. It’s like it’s just, it’s impossible, but yet the mind gets confused and has patterns of thinking in all of this. But it just points to the example that in the most real way in this life, you’re not experiencing something out there. You’re just experiencing the one and how you see. And everything that’s felt, everything that seen everything that is projected from you is a teacher that points you back to wholeness. It points back to the expansion of wholeness for love to continue to bloom.
It’s like you says [sic] you have no spiritual background, but, um, when the spirit’s presence, all the spiritual, so when you need some kind of practice, it’s when you separate yourself. [agreement] Because there’s no need to have edgy background. [agreement]
Because of a funny answer, I gave someone, they [sic] said, “Do you think I need a spiritual practice?” I said, “If you think you need a spiritual practice, you definitely need a spiritual practice”. [agreement] But again, you see,
Whatever that is [agreement]
It’s allowed. [agreement] See, it’s not finding the right thing or the wrong thing. It’s allowed. And if everything’s allowed, then the question is, “What’s a moving?”
The thing we’ll find you. [agreement]
Like what’s moving? [agreement] And I love that inquiry rather than, “What should I do?” The question of what’s moving is an openness that trust. You see the mind’s idea is that there’s something moving that could be wrong. There’s something moving that could be blamed, but when you see that it’s all blameless, you open to allow and you listen, and that’s where you find the guidance. That’s where you find the answer. It’s already given to you. It’s so amazing, so amazing.
It’s like we’re swimming in a miracle or something. What do you say to people who say, I’m not spiritual person?
Well, I think there’s a bit of confusion there, you know. When people say, I’m not spiritual, but my– from my perspective like, “Are we spiritual?” We ask of it. [agreement]
Do you think it’s just a separate confusion?
I think it’s funny that spirit would say that I’m not spiritual. [laughter] In that to me, it’s just comedy. [agreement] Right? One way that I look at this is that anything that comes out of anybody’s mouth isn’t true [laughter] including my [inaudible], including my own.
There can be no true words spoken ’cause like, for example, if somebody says I’m not spiritual, do you see how I interpret that? So do I actually hear them or do I hear myself? this is really, really, really important. You’re not actually hearing what other people say. You’re hearing your interpretation. And so in this, you’re actually talking to yourself whenever anybody talks to you.
This is a real profound opportunity to see that. Like as I’m speaking here today, everything you’re hearing, you’re interpreting, you’re giving meaning to according to your experience. And everyone in this room is hearing something different. Nobody actually hears me, which is why I have no concern in that way. Do you see that knowing that nobody hears me for one, I don’t have to think about it? I don’t have to try and say the right thing. I can just flow. Just be sincere and let you hear whatever you hear.
And so anything that you hear in this experience is your own creation. 100%. it’s like even if I were to tell you my life story, you wouldn’t hear my life story. You’d hear your interpretation.
And so regardless, if somebody says something and it pisses you off, you pissed yourself off so you could see something. There’s nothing that escapes the perfection of this.. That every experience that you have is designed to wake you up. It’s designed to open up your being to experience the magnitude of the truth of what you are. And that discovery continues to expand and expand and expand in such a way that right now, you might be having an insight and it thinks it’s all, ‘Wow, that’s it and then come back next week. Holy Shit! It keeps going”. [inaudible]
Right? Because your mind thinks it understands to a certain profound level, but how far do you think that goes? And for me, that’s the real amazing quality of life is that this love doesn’t stop in its expansion to the degree that you can love life, which includes everything. There is no end to that. For me, that’s the game. That’s the opportunity of being here. Is it continual unraveling, of life, depth and beauty, which is what makes these moments so much fun is to just sit for a moment and go, “Oh, yeah! that’s actually a miracle. I forgot”.
And then you get to give that miracle away. Do you notice this that even as we’re discovering these things and it’s opening something, there’s a movement inside that just wants to give it away? That just wants to see people in this love? That wants this love to look out into the world? That’s sharing. When you see this love in the world, you are sharing this love and you’re not even doing anything
It’s definitely a lazy man’s path. “Don’t do, just see. Just see, man”, because you’re doing comes from how you see. Just so funny. We’re so caught up in action and doing something, not realizing that all doing all action comes from how you see. You can completely forget about the doing, even other people’s doing. Hear this – you can give up all of your ideas about other people’s actions and their doing because that’s the last step. Where does it all come from? How they see if their actions are violent? What do they see? They see themselves as unlovable.
So what’s the answer? See them as lovable.
“Could I do anything?” Let’s see what happens. But see them as lovable. And then the perfect action will come out of that love.
It’s like, forgive yourself and then see what happens. Right? It’s not, ‘I need to figure out my life and I need to do the right things… dah…dah…dah…dah…dah”. No. Start with the truth. Forgive yourself. Be still, and then see what happens. And then from that energy of love and forgiveness, something will move from love and forgiveness. And that will be your offering to the world.