11) You're Not Being Rejected; Relax and Breathe - Meditate Now
Audio Version - Guided Meditation
So we're going to do a meditation, and the topic is “You’re Not Being Rejected; Relax and Breathe."
Can I just gently lay out a disclaimer? — If you feel rejected or if you have a pattern of feeling rejected, that's okay. It's part of it.
It comes with our adorable and innocent misunderstanding. It is not separate from the cosmic design. It has its place as a pointer, ultimately leading us back to what is sacred and true if we're willing to listen.
If you take things personally, if you get rejected and it seems real, that's fine. But let's take a breath and see if that's actually happening.
That's what we're going to do in this meditation today.
We're going to take a breath and extend permission for the perception of being rejected to happen. But we're also going to look beyond that perception and see that maybe what we think is happening isn't really happening.
So let's dive into that. Let's go.
Start of Guided Meditation
Relax and Breathe
As a doorway into this moment, let's just recognize the breath for a moment. Just see that it's here, that it's happening.
We're just bringing a little bit more of our attention to what is happening right now.
We can move from a mind that's busy thinking about this, that, and the other and relax into the reality of this moment.
We can feel the breath go in and out, again and again, and again.
Just be here with it.
Now, as we're resting in this space, we're going to do just a little bit of an exercise.
I invite you to put your attention on anything that appears to be happening that could potentially be annoying.
Maybe there's a sound in the distance. Maybe there's a sensation in the body. Maybe it's my voice. Whatever it might be.
Just look at it for a second.
Maybe it's even a thought.
Would I invite you to gently investigate; is to ask yourself the question — “am I experiencing that something, or am I experiencing my interpretation about that something?”
Is my irritation caused by that noise? Is it caused by that thought? Is it caused by that sensation?
Or is my irritation in response to how I'm perceiving that something?
We recognize rather quickly, that this irritation that we have, which we might call a pain, that something out there doesn't have the power over you to give you that irritation.
In such a way that, maybe before we came together to meditate, you were irritated by something that was happening.
Then you got still and took some breaths, and the irritation started to melt away, if only a little bit, and the thing maybe didn't even lean.
You see, as you became more and more present, your perception of that something shifted.
Maybe your attention wasn't on it as much.
What’s Really Happening vs Your Interpretation
I really just invite you to see this, practically speaking, that the irritations that we experience or anything that we experience inside of ourselves — it's not responding to what's happening, it's responding to how we perceive what we think is happening.
For example, for myself, I'm here doing meditation, and there's a dog right outside barking occasionally.
Do you see how I could perceive that as a huge interruption, an annoyance? Something that's in my way from doing what I think I'm supposed to be doing?
My irritation, if there is in response to that interpretation, it's not responding to the dog barking.
The more I think that it is the dog causing my irritation, then the more this pain gets projected onto the dog and says, if only the dog wasn't the dog, then I wouldn't be irritated. — That's simply not true.
As I see that it's not true, I take a breath and release the blame that's pointed toward the dog.
I come back to myself and I address the real issue.
I feel this recognition, this short little exercise is paramount as we approach the subject of being rejected.
Because naturally, that internal sensation of being rejected is a pain. It's a disturbance.
What is it responding to? What's happening? Or my interpretation about what's happening?
When somebody says they don't want to hang out with me, am I experiencing what's really happening? Or am I experiencing my interpretation?
You see, the pain in the experience of being rejected — it's a response to an interpretation that says, this means I'm not enough.
This means I'm unlovable. This means I'm unworthy.
Now, let me ask you something very, very gently.
Does it really mean that?
Or is that what I turn it into with my imagination?
So I ask you more deeply, my dear.
Who is rejecting who?
Who is saying you're less than?
Who is saying you're unlovable?
Who is saying you're unworthy?
Do you see it's all based on an innocent misunderstanding? It's not seeing what's really happening.
Can you breathe into that for me just a little bit?
Maybe if there are experiences that you're still carrying about feeling rejected on your journey, can you see that these are interpretations that proclaim you're not enough?
Let's ask a question and take a moment of silence. — Is that really true? Or is it simply a thought believed in? A conditioned pattern of thinking sprung from an innocent misunderstanding?
When somebody else goes from here to there, is that really about you?
Let's also look at something.
If somebody says, I don't like you, is that about you?
Or is that just what they see? Is that their experience?
If I say that I don't like bubble gum ice cream, which I don't, is that really about the bubble gum ice cream? Or is that about my experience, what I see contained within what I am?
You see, my friend, the question is "what is true?" not "what do I think is happening?"
What is true?
Rest with Our Fear
Relax, breathe; You're not being rejected.
This is so important to see, and I'll tell you why.
If you believe you're being rejected, you will withhold love.
In the same way that if I think the dog is interrupting me, I'll curse the dog. I'll hate the dog.
In that expression of hate, who is the one that feels the hate?
In that withholding of love? Who is the one that feels a love withheld?
I don't extend love for others. I extend love for the sake of my own sanity.
I love what is because anything else is a misunderstanding.
Something in you desires for love to flow.
You are the one that is going to have to let that love flow, and that happens by seeing what's true.
Yes, I understand that it might feel like you're being rejected, I get that. I get that.
But is that what's happening? Or maybe, are you just scared?
If you're just scared, maybe we don't have to make up a bunch of stories and throw those stories at other people.
Maybe we can rest with our fear.
Maybe we can hold a space for ourselves and not demand that somebody else do it.
Don't reject your fear. Don't reject your heart.
Whatever arises within you is asking for your loving attention.
It's okay to be with what you are. It's okay to hold a space for what you are. It's okay to be scared.
YOU are the Love that You’ve Been Waiting For
Let's just take a few more breaths and moments together.
As we close out this meditation, I want to say something super compassionately, but also directly.
I want to be gentle with these words.
If you think somebody else is rejecting you, that's you seeing yourself being rejected; that's you telling a story that says what you are is not enough, what you are is less than.
My dear, this is an innocent misunderstanding. It's just not true.
These are stories in the mind, believed in.
These are patterns of thinking conditioning that we've picked up along the way.
That's okay. But it's also time to allow them to unravel and let ourselves fall into love's embrace.
We can hold ourselves and say, "you know what? I'm sorry. I'm sorry for seeing you as less than. I'm sorry for seeing you as unworthy."
Then come home to yourself.
See what you really are.
You will see that YOU are the love that you've been waiting for.
Until next time.
Cheers to the beauty that you already are.